making love-based choices
Hard times lead to a moment when you think you’re done.
At capacity, it can feel hopeless. Exhaustion fuels stress. Stress fuels fear. Fear is…. real and scary. And from that place, you can shut down and lose all sense of humanity.
When we shut down we can make what I call fear-based choices. These are scarce, self-focused, and reactive. Fear gives us tunnel vision where it’s hard to see beyond our own experience.
How does fear lead to fear-based choices? It starts when our emotions determine our beliefs.
While all our emotions are welcome and a part of the human experience, our beliefs are a choice. And here’s the thing —
What you believe you find evidence of.
belief:
an acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists
Beliefs are powerful. They can bring together or divide. Heal or harm. Love or hate.
Here’s a simple pathway to how this happens:
Our emotions create our beliefs
Beliefs become the lens through which we see the world
That lens drives our choices and actions
The simpler math is this:
Fear-based beliefs lead to fear-based choices.
Example —
I feel anxiety. I believe people are only out for themselves. The lens I view the world is that people are selfish. I choose to judge and be selfish too.
Love-based beliefs lead to love-based choices.
Example —
I feel anxiety. I believe we will get through this together. The lens I view the world is that people deep down care. I choose to be compassionate.
Creating love-based beliefs
Pause. Take a breath. What’s guiding your choices right now? Is it fear or is it love?
The key moment is the space between emotions and beliefs Here is a powerful practice I use with my coaching clients to making love-based choices. Let’s find evidence of humanity.